The "Therian Urge" to Suppress Other Experiences

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Something has bothered me ever since I stumbled across the therian community, something I could never quite put my paw on. Till now.

There's an issue within the community; well, there's. tons, actually. But one in particular stands out: the community acts less like a "community", a loose collection of similar or related experiences, and instead more like a country club, a place with strict definitions and rules of being.

There's heavy focus on the "right" or "wrong" way to "be a therian", there's debate over what the "real definition" of a therian is, and there's hostility and vitriol directed at anyone who breaks the mold. Doesn't fit into what's widely recognized as "right". I'm particularly talking about physical nonhumans here, or really any nonhuman who takes the label "nonhuman" in its entirety, anyone who is truly, and fully, nonhuman, physically or not. Therians agonize over what their "type" is, they stress their animality is "strictly and 100% non-physical", they follow a bunch of unwritten rules set by beings the community has long since moved past. Anyone who breaks the mold is attacked. Called a "faker", told they're not a "real therian", accused of "ruining the community". I'm seeing it happen again, right now, in real time, with the so-called "TikTok Therians".

As someone who was an animal other-than-human from birth, and knew as much, only growing to accept and ibrace its otherness a whole 20 years later.. I don't fucking understand the need to conform and force others to conform. Especially to such restrictive definitions and rules. The community says it's not roleplaying, says it's not make believe or anything, but I find that hard to believe with such strict rules and inability to accept a multitude of experiences in the realm of nonhumanity.

I was a fox from birth. I knew this. I might not have known what species in particular I was, but I knew I wasn't human. The ears twitching atop my head, the tail lashing behind me.. wait, what? Where- are my bits? What was this accursed body I was in? I ran on four legs, clothes felt uncomfortable and unnatural, I growled and purred. It was "cute", but not for long. After a while I was forced to conform to the society I was born into. Walk on two legs, wear clothes, and speak human language. My growls grew quieter, my purrs were never heard again, except maybe for a party trick. I never stopped craning my ears and wagging my tail, though; I was the only one who could feel or see it, so it was never beaten out of me like everything else.

I was always an animal. A not-human, animal. An animal forced to conform to a society it doesn't fit into through virtue of being born into a corresponding body.

I shunned my animality, I never told anyone I experienced a tail and ears I could control independently, I never told anyone about the clothing crimes I committed as a kit, and any thought of entertaining my animality was shut down faster than I could even think it; not because I wanted to, but because a single peep otherwise would be grounds for punishment from any humans around me. I thought I was alone, and nobody would ever understand. So mine alone was the weight to bear. It was my little secret.

Then I stumbled across the therian 'community'. I still don't riiber what stroke of fate let me down that rabbit hole, but I spent weeks, months, years, falling down it. I might not riiber what sparked it, but I do riiber the spark I had at first. I was enamored. Here was a whole community of others like me!! Other animals stuck in the same predicament as me, animals other-than-human stuck living in a human society.

That's.. what I thought.

The cracks started quickly.

First it was stupid drama, "p-shifting cults", "graymuzzles" controlling the community from the shadows and siccing the majority on anyone who's opinion their disapproved of (I watched someone get bullied to the point of deleting their account, so..), then delusional nonhumans, and "KFF".

It quickly devolved into constant riinders that the definition meant therians are physically human, and still acknowledge such, "therians are still hardworking productive mibers of society!! we know we're human!! we're not actually animals." they'd bark and howl. It devolved into attacking anyone who didn't share the same sanitized experience they did.

Now, I know I'll get a ton of vitriol and hate for this, and for one, it's good I'm posting this on a site where nobody will end up seeing this anyway, and for two, well. Sorry, but not sorry, it has to be said.

I started getting the feeling therians were just "roleplaying" in a sense. Not actually animals but just performing wishful thinking. Just humans who wished they weren't. Which is.. ironic considering the amount of vitriol towards "TikTok Therians" for the same reason.

And sure, you can look at my body and call it human. I can't run with my kin, I can't communicate with thi, I can't experience the life they do. They can't experience the one I do. But I'm no less non-human for that. In the same sense that my body is whatever gender I call it, it's whatever I call it outside the realm of gender too.

And sure, maybe I'm just crazy and I'm just a "human who wishes they weren't" myself.

But. Does it matter?

This excessive focus on who's real and who's not, the idea that you can pointedly tell someone what they're experiencing is "wrong" if it doesn't fit your specific definition.. it took what I felt was once just my little secret, and violently ripped it out of my paws, twisting it into something that gradually became unrecognizable. Something I once felt comfort in, something I once felt was an irriovable part of me, gradually became not mine. It wasn't my experience anymore. It was subject to scrutiny and judgment if I performed or experienced it wrong, it wasn't my experience, it was a label I needed to uphold to a certain standard.

My experience was no longer how I experienced it, it became molded by what was "right" and "wrong", what the popular therians dictated was "right" or "wrong".

It's not all bad however.. there's one thing I have the therian "community" to thank for, and that is for giving me that initial spark of hope, that initial thought that maybe. just maybe. I'm not entirely alone.

Because that made me realize that I can just be myself. It made me realize that being myself makes me happy, it makes me comfortable.

Even though I feel just as alone now, after finding, joining, and subsequently permanently exiting the therian community, as I did before I even knew about it's existence, I can ibrace myself, every part of it.

And I actually like clothes now. I've grown to like a lot of what I get to experience in this body that the rest of my kin otherwise don't. I definitely lament missing out on the experiences I would've otherwise, but hey, video games and pizza aren't too bad.